Oddly Measured

How we work things out

Oddly Measured is built on one rule: the joke interprets the result, it never replaces it. Everything below explains how a number gets from your answers to your screen.

Where every value comes from

Each number used in a calculation belongs to exactly one of five classes.

Your answer
Something you told us. Most of a result is made of these.
Worked out
Pure arithmetic on your answers and standard units — a mean year of 365.2425 days,52.1775 weeks in a year, exact metric conversions.
Published source
An externally sourced constant. Every one is listed on this page with its publisher, its derivation and its limits.
Estimate
A starting point we offer because no reliable public figure exists. These are always labelled and always editable.
Illustration
A comparison used to make a quantity feel real. Comparison objects are either true by definition, fixed by a governing body, or drawn from the sources below.

How numbers are displayed

  • Calculations keep full precision internally. Rounding only happens on the way out.
  • Counts above a thousand are shown to three significant figures. Claiming you have eaten exactly 327,412 chickens would be worse than useless.
  • Units adapt to the size of the answer — grams become kilograms become tonnes.
  • Currency is a presentation choice. Nothing is converted between currencies, and no exchange-rate service is used.
  • Projections are always separated from what has already happened, and labelled as projections.

What we will not do

  • Invent a plausible-looking constant to make a sentence work.
  • Show a confidence percentage without a statistical basis for it.
  • Convert an activity into "time wasted" by assigning arbitrary seconds to it.
  • Moralise about food, money, screens, work, pets or exercise.

The source registry

These are every externally sourced value in the product. Each one is transcribed at full precision, used at full precision, and displayed rounded.

REFERENCE_WHOLE_CHICKEN_COOKED_MEAT_G

about 572 g (g)

Cooked, boned chicken meat without skin from a representative 3.5 lb whole broiler-fryer, excluding neck and giblets.

USDA yield: 1 lb whole chicken as purchased → 0.36 lb cooked, boned meat without skin.
USDA FSIS describes a whole broiler-fryer as typically 3–4 lb; the reference bird uses the 3.5 lb midpoint.
3.5 lb × 0.36 = 1.26 lb cooked meat
1.26 lb × 453.59237 g/lb = 571.5263862 g

Limits: Whole birds vary in size and cooking yield. This is a declared reference equivalent, not a claim that every chicken produces exactly 572 g of edible meat.

Status: verified · next review 2027-08-17

Used by: Chickens Eaten

REFERENCE_SPAGHETTI_GRAMS_PER_METRE

about 3.58 g per metre (g/m)

Lineal mass of one reference dry spaghetti strand, derived from a measured 1.78 mm diameter and a measured apparent dry density of 1.440 g/cm³.

Treat a strand as a cylinder.
diameter = 1.78 mm = 0.178 cm, so radius = 0.089 cm
volume per metre = π × 0.089² cm² × 100 cm
mass per metre = volume × 1.440 g/cm³ ≈ 3.5833759789 g/m

Limits: Spaghetti thickness varies by brand and shape. This uses one representative measured reference strand rather than implying every spaghetti product has the same lineal density.

Status: verified · next review 2027-08-17

Used by: Kilometres of Spaghetti

RAW_POTATO_PER_FINISHED_CRISPS_FACTOR

about 1.50 g of raw potato per gram of crisps (g raw per g finished)

Raw potato required per gram of finished potato crisps at the processor gate.

Published processed-potato life-cycle model reports a finished potato-chip yield of 66.67% of raw potato received at the processor gate.
raw / finished = 1 / 0.6667 ≈ 1.4999250037

Limits: A representative industrial processing yield that includes finished-product oil and moisture effects. Individual products and processes differ.

Status: verified · next review 2027-08-17

Used by: Potatoes Behind My Chips

RAW_POTATO_PER_FINISHED_FRIES_FACTOR

about 1.63 g of raw potato per gram of chips (g raw per g finished)

Raw potato required per gram of finished fries or hot chips at the processor gate.

The same published processed-potato model reports a finished fries yield of 61.35% of raw potato received at the processor gate.
raw / finished = 1 / 0.6135 ≈ 1.62999185

Limits: A representative industrial yield, not a universal restaurant or home-cooking ratio.

Status: verified · next review 2027-08-17

Used by: Potatoes Behind My Chips

REFERENCE_TENNIS_BALL_MASS_G

about 57.7 g (g)

Illustrative reference mass for one approved tennis ball, taken as the midpoint of the approved 56.0–59.4 g range.

(56.0 g + 59.4 g) / 2 = 57.7 g

Limits: An illustrative single reference value for a range. Dog toys are not tennis balls; this is only used as a familiar mass comparison.

Status: verified · next review 2027-08-17

Used by: Toys Destroyed by My Dog